Whether you’re approaching it, worrying about it, in the midst of it, turning 50 can be tortuous.
Why 50 is the new 17
I’m personally a bit fed up of hearing in the media about all the women turning 50, who feel they are more confident in themselves, more successful in their careers and reaping the benefits of all the years they’ve put into work and family and life.
My experience – and that of soooo many of my friends & clients – whilst to the outside world may be a picture of confidence, the reality is so far removed from this picture.
The truth is, it sneaks up on us. We find ourselves feeling more tired, a bit forgetful, not quite as on the ball as we were. For me, I was only in my mid forties. I was moody. Irritable. Really emotional. And really, really anxious. About everything.
It’s bloody turbulent.
When we’re a teenager, everyone accepts that we’re going to be an irrational nightmare. And we will have read enough to know that it’s just a passing phase. And it’s just our hormones, it’s not us.
When we’re 17, we are moving away from the safety and security of being a child, being looked after, having our needs taken care of. A huge part of us wants to cut the cords and forge our new life as an adult. But it takes time. And its not a smooth path.
But it’s no different at the other end. We need to move into the next phase of our lives. But most of us are so unaware of the biology of midlife that it scares the bejesus out of us. I thought I was going crazy. That I was losing my mind. That I had dementia. That I was becoming this terrible, terrible person - and my life was falling apart. And worst of all, that I couldn’t cope.
I was a health coach - how could I be feeling so dreadful - and not able to sort myself out?
Our bodies are changing and our lives are often changing too - with kids moving out, relationships changing, parents raging
And for so many women, theis can cause quite a meltdown.